The Tampon that Changed My Life
Sunday, September 28, 2008 at 07:46PM I remember that day so clearly. I was still a young man then—not much over
forty, as they say in the AARP youth brochures. I had been teaching at Emerald
City High for at least fifteen years.
I was writing subject-verb
agreement sentences on the blackboard and I wanted to proceed slowly and with
great care. This particular class was somewhat resistant to instruction. One
student had recently bitten a classmate in her biology class (her counselor told
me that she had "personal space" issues). Another student was struggling to fart
on command, while another was sucking her thumb. They were all part of a college
prep program. As we say at Emerald City High, college prep means that you have
no definite plans for going to jail….
"Does anyone know which
subject you would choose to figure out the verb form?" I had written an example
sentence on the board: "Either four cars or a bus (is, are) needed to take
the Y group up to Devil's Lake." I was about to underline the word "bus"
when it happened. Across my shoulder floated the white cylindrical shape; a
ghostly missile fired near my head. It hit the verb "is" on the board with a
soft "pfft" sound. Then it fell.
I stared at the thing as it lay at my
feet.
A tampon—someone had thrown a tampon at me....
Reader Comments